DANGER!, Occupancy Limit Breached, taking on fur, Abandon House, ABANDON HOUSE! WEEOO WEEOO!

Welcome to my living nightmare! haha

My blog is taking a disturbingly feline bent, but so is my home, so I guess it makes sense. Last Thursday (I think) while Mark and I were playing magic (Jealous?) a tiny black fur ball appeared outside and caught Jessica's attention (obviously). She sent me out with her on a cat hunting expedition, however this cat wasn't having our reindeer games. He/she didn't so much 'run' away from us, as trot away at a controlled pace keeping us at no less then 6 feet away at all times. We foolishly made a lunge for the cat down by the fire pit which freaked it out good and proper and I assumed that would be the last we heard from it....

But low and behold it came back every other day save one, Jessica as you Can imagine began feeding and falling in love with the cat at a break neck speed. Over the course of the next few days the cat was fed and studied ala the Geiko commercials.

Last night I went to the fridge to get some ice for my tasty sweet tea which involves opening the sliding door because in our ghetto rific house you can't open the freezer all the way and still keep the door closed; who would want to though, honestly. Then I notice a pathetic little meow through the screen door and see the kitty staring inside and crying (it should be noted that it was raining and cold and terrible outside at this time). Jessica craftily used this opportunity to lure the cat into our home by placing her food just enough in the house that the kitten (did I mention it was a kitten before this? If I didn't its a totally tiny kitten) had to enter the house to snack. Then whilst the kitten was busy eating she snuck around the back of the house and closed the screen door behind the cat without it even noticing.

Once said kitten, whom we call 'boots' or 'socks' its still up in the air, (she is a tiny black cat with white feet, I could not find a picture that gave her feral green crazy eyes, and Albert Einstein like fur proper attention) was finished eating she realized her egregious error. Then came the 4 hours of hilarious fear and anger...

She sat huddled by the now closed door for a while, then once we got her to move away from the screen door just a bit we attempted to close the sliding glass door, during which time she would scurry back and forth attempting to get smashed. She then tentatively wandered around the kitchen until our new cat Emma approached her. But since Emma is a big fat sweetheart they got along just fine immediately. She even got along fine with Kiley, but she was most certainly not having any of our shit. I'm fairly certain she's under the impression that we are T-rex's and if she stands really still then we can't possibly see her and thereby eat her. She is all about finding a too tiny spot, backing into it, and staring out with her crazy eyes filled with fear if we approach. If you have been in our bathroom you know how low the big white towel holder sits to the ground, when Jessica attempted to show the cat where we made her poo box, she crammed herself under that, and stayed there until we went to bed, haha. She is really cute, and hopefully will become more friendly as time goes by, otherwise we eats her!

(I forgot to mention that about 10 minutes after we got the sliding glass door closed something spooked boots and she charged for the glass door. She even did an awesome little victory leap on her approach. But with the door closed this quickly turned into a victory smash, followed by a ninja quick 180 turn around, back into door, stare out terror filled eyes, CHEESE TO A CORNER! was some funny stuff)

In other news... I finished painting the house last week! And was rewarded by the wife immediately giving me more 'home improvement' tasks to accomplish. She needs a lobotomy of whatever part of her brain forces her to constantly want to make change with the house. I'm of the mindset that you do a little some'n some'n every now and then, and in the in between time you just enjoy the house, but she can't ever seem to enjoy. All she see's is problems. She's like Spawn or Raistlin and only see's death, haha.

Aside from that all I have been up to is catching up on my TV shows, I really love this new show called Sons of Anarchy or something like that. It's on FX and is a pretty quality show. We have also started playing football on the weekends which has been ridiculous fun, but I think we may miss out this weekend, I am trying to rectify that though... Ohh and I get to go to a Chiefs game with Mark, so that really really owns. Sadly it is against the Titans so it will probably end in shame and pain, but whatever, that just means more Colquitt!

Time for change...

Hmm, I really need to change the daily blog name on this to the 'random attacks of interest Bob' or something along those lines....

I've been super busy lately, which is actually kind of fun after the pre burning man constant plan of "Do NOTHING!, SOMETHING costs money(fear)". But now that we are back and have no pressing concerns we have eaten out a couple of times and are taking the time (and spending the dough) to get some of our ever growing house concerns fixed.

I've spent that last 5 afternoons working on painting the house, but in proper outside painting fashion only two of those days so far have actually been spent using paint. While the other were spent sacrificing my fingers to various spiders and spikey bits. Its starting to look really nice though. The funny thing is we mostly have people over for night time parties, so I doubt anyone will even notice, haha.

I haven't seen Jyesika mention the addition to our household on her blog yet, so I'll do the honors. We picked up a new cat from the Human Society (which involved having a retina scan, providing a family tree dating back to when my great, great, great (you get the picture) Grandpa Bobglegbhabob crawled out of the primordial ooze... I always just at the chance to use the term 'primordial ooze' its just so ninja turtle, I love it! Anyway back to the cat, she is basically a semi clone of Tula Ben's cat (Drew's brother, who I should call to hang more often at our gatherings, but he is always ladying it up that sexi bastard).

She is incredibly awesome though, I fell in love with her within the first day. I would say what sold it for me was her immediate coolness with my crabby aging puppy Kiley (I can totally call her a puppy and aging in the same sentence, bugger off!). They basically went through the usual ass end inspection and then were good to go, I am assuming it is their Grayness that bonds them, Kiley probably thinks she is looking in a mirror, per cataract dog. Hmmm, I am clearly living with the Gray nesters now, Darren would be so happy. But yea, she is ridiculous portly, made all the more silly by her tiny and petite head. She is so huge that our old cat box can't contain her awesome girth. Its an exciting poo explosion in there, Its almost as if Michael Bay directs her bowel movements.

(I was going to try and find a picture with bay directing an explosion, but that smile was just to perfect... Google image search + paint shop + 1 minute of effort = win!)

Its been so long since I wrote last I have so much catching up to do, but I'll cover more in future posts, I don't want to log down (is that the right phrase? log down... can't be... bog down... yes bog down.... ohh well, I'm log'n this one down) the maaaybe one person who has this on their RSS feed. In short, Zombie Nights are so far unparalleled success, Chiefs are on the comeback trail, my magic decks are unstoppable, and the price of schlop in China must have gone up cause King ate up like 7 bones yesterday, price raising bastards; How am I to feel disgustingly cheap if I am paying that much, gross class!

Oops!

Hah! It took me so long to figure out how to get this blog back under my control that now I am to tired/ brain hurty to actually blog, but I'm back, woo! Goo hawks!

2 hours later

And like two hours after everyone has gone to bed, and I have been bored to tears my stomach finally stops being bitchy, and the burping stops! yay. Hoping it stays gone, still totally confused as to what made me sick, I swear I ate good for bob things. Anywho will make a proper post later today, I promise....

p.s. to meself, remember to call people about fantasy basketball, and remember to remind yurself how awesome you are.

Chester Molester

Once Again posting right before I go to bed, so rather tired and am not gonna write a whole heckuva lot moreNlikely.

First wanted to give a quick rundown of some movies I have seen in the theatre's lately.

The Protector - Basically Ong-Bak II, but with even worse American editing then Ong-bak, I look forward to the DVD though, the fight scenes were great, but it was more or less disappointing, maybe I expected to much after the glory that is Ong-bak.

Crank - OMFG, LOL, WTFBBQ is all I can say about this movie, it was so gloriously over-the-top. This movie's shenanigans are to other movie shenanigans, as Dynamite is to poprocks, it was great.

Beerfest - admittedly the fact that this movie tossed Mark into a drinking binge isn't saying much considering he is more or less forever locked in an eternal drinking Binge, however it was Absolute Redemption for the glorious cast of Super Troopers after making the excrement laden Dread Island or wtf it was, haha(Brain worky not so good right now).

Little Miss Sunshine - absolutely Brilliant, allstar cast, allstar performance, allstar script, allstar soundtrack, allstar directing, allstar smells, the allstars taste like allstars, Its Slaptastic, go see it, now.....Stop reading....The rest is just drivel....Go now damn you!

The Science of Sleep - For starters the name seems to have little to do with the movie, aside from a sleep theme, I learned no scientific methodologies; Kathy would be dearly disappointed. The characters seemed poorly thought out, and had superfluous attributes that did not fit them, just not that great of a movie, some fun visuals though.

I was supposed to look up stuff on honey moon sites tonight, but I got to distracted playing to much final fantasy and talking to Drew and reading sports, alas. Ahh well that is sweet payback for the abuse I had to take last night. When I went into bed, like a nice friendly manfriend, I was yelled @ for wanting some covers, then she got out of bed to use the restroom, came back in, kicked me, yelled @ me some more and turned away. I went to bed sad and confused, prolly like Hamid does every night.

As to the title of the blog, I had the unpleasant sensation of feeling like a child molester or pedophilia or Drew Farmer/Michael Harry/Jeef Laws, take your pick. I was waiting outside the changing room for jessica (@ umm Gap I think). But it was in the kids section, little girls to be exact, so I just sorta stalked around with my coke, and my usual creepiness amongst the little girls, nervous moms, and silly clothes, was quite unnerving.

Bob done now
Bob sleep
Bob dream
Bob wake up
Bob go to work
Bob try not to kill himself
rinse repeat.

Cracked out

Sooooo, got so bored decided to forget about my not till the house thing and just go ahead and blog................. eat me.

K, actually typing this first sentence last, realized after I wrote all that other crap that I forgot to mention that I'm married and it owns. I feel very happy and very secure, its really quite nice. Makes you feel solid, less worried about the crap life throws @ you cause now someone contractually has to be in your corner.

I'm tweaking out on lack of sleep, lack of jessica, lack of friends, lack of life, and way to much frappaccino. Woooohah! Accidentally stayed up a to long, and figured welp to late now, may as well stay up all day and see what happens. More then likely the see what happens will be the pink pixies riding velociraptor that I am able to convince myself are fake for the moment will eventually seem real and then I can go into a nice warm psychotic episode.

Watched King Kong earlier today, which totally pissed me off. A cause it was a completely crappily done movie. Makes me wander if Peter jackson had a chimpanzee or something that was editing, shooting etc the Lord of the Rings, cause this movie looked like something an fx studio would poop out. Jack Black actually had a decent performance though I thought, everyone else was to handicapped by the ineptitude of the director to tell if they were worth anything. And as to my second point I got pissed off cause despite how terribly the movie was made I was still totally saddened when the ape died, which confounds me, I'm blaming the lack of sleep for now.

Achieved level 75 in Final Fantasy last night, which was way more anti climatic then I wanted it to be. I remember when I first started playing and just sorta assumed you would feel all badass, bubblegum ass beater when you were level 75, but I still feel pretty weak, maybe it is cause my job class makes me such a pansy, who knows.

In other dark and dreary news, my fantasy team has totally crapped out. Luckily being that I slept through the draft I have no real connection to them and as such don't really care much. But yea my number one draft pick broke his foot, my number three did something or another to his ankle, and the rest of my team seems to be having a sever case of vaganitus.

Don't really want to deal with my dad issue yet, so ignoring that, actually was about to type some more, but decided I don't feel like it, off to look for some picture to post on here, wee!

I've decided I feel like a combo of this >>>


and this >>>

Down for Construction

Don't bother attempting to read this website for about a month, the work on our house and subsequent crappolla that we have to take care of is eating to much of my time, after we are moved in and have internet up and working @ our new house I promise to blog again.

until we meet again